Zuck#: A programming language for connecting the world. And harvesting it

jayzalowitz.github.io

65 points

kf

17 hours ago


41 comments

maomaomiumiu 2 hours ago

I still don’t really get the point. If the joke works without being a programming language, why make it one? We already have plenty of real languages people don’t want to learn or maintain — adding a satirical one feels more like a novelty than a statement.

chrisnight 14 hours ago

I’d be interested to see a satirical concept like this that goes more in depth by, say, having the operational semantics help fuel the satire. When I see things like this, I always feel underwhelmed when it’s just a keyword swap.

For example, take the title. Imagine if the PL was a declarative way of describing a distributed system, with HTTP endpoints or web sockets connecting modules. Then, for harvesting, it gives unbounded ability for nodes to read and write to other nodes outside of the standard interface. You can just go in and read/write their data, without any public interface needed. Of course someone else can probably come up with something better, but I think it’d be cool to see something that more fully uses what a “programming language” means.

  • jayzalowitz 13 hours ago

    Im the author. Feel free to dm me anything you want added.

halperter 16 hours ago

I don't think I've seen satire in the form of a programming language before :). Neat. Does anyone else have any other examples? All I can think of are languages like Velado (uses notes) and Piet.

  • forgotpwd16 16 hours ago

    Some well-known satire/parody languages are Omgrofl, Shakespeare, ArnoldC, but there're many more. Can check https://esolangs.org/wiki/Category:Thematic & https://esolangs.org/wiki/Category:Joke_languages. But although weird esolangs, don't see how Velda and Piet be considered satire.

    • zahlman 16 hours ago

      I would say these are just joke languages that aren't trying to parody anything or use satire.

      When I think of parody or satire in programming languages, the example that comes to mind is the "C plus equality" project used for rather trolling critique of contemporary "social justice" ideology.

    • sedatk 14 hours ago

      INTERCAL was also a satire of the programming languages of its era, AFAIK.

  • tyre 16 hours ago

    These are the types of projects that are becoming viable with AI. Previously they were too expensive.

    I love this.

    • mrisse 15 hours ago

      Many types of projects are now vibable.

    • refulgentis 15 hours ago

      It isn't a programming language. It is a static site written by AI, with jokes written by AI. Tastes like microwaved steak & it definitely would not have been too expensive to do before AI.

      • jayzalowitz 13 hours ago

        No, actually Zuck# works, this is a working language.

  • dleslie 16 hours ago
    • ronsor 16 hours ago

      It's designed completely wrong.

      Trump programs would end with "Thank you for your attention to this matter."

      • zahlman 16 hours ago

        The project dates to the 2016 election campaign and was archived in 2020. I don't think Trump had that particular speech affect that time around, or at least I can't recall it being memed upon the way it is now.

  • bryanrasmussen 16 hours ago

    I mean theoretically brainf*ck is, but I'm pretty if you were to find satirical programming languages they would be satirizing development itself or a type of development (object-oriented, functional), and this is satirizing a purpose of development.

forgotpwd16 16 hours ago

A rare example of language implemented atop PHP. Should've made with Llama for extra Meta points.

  • psnehanshu 16 hours ago

    Or atleast should have been Hack

timeon 16 hours ago

Probably not related but source of page is also funny: '<section class="section">'

  • refulgentis 15 hours ago

    It's written by AI, I strongly believe (ex. the random konami code)

    • jayzalowitz 13 hours ago

      Am author: This is accurate.

  • IncreasePosts 15 hours ago

    should probably have id="section" too, then you don't need to do all that hard work remembering if you should write section, #section, or .section in your code

hulitu 4 hours ago

> Requires PHP 8.1+

... any other version will break it. RIP SW engineering.

I guess this has become a mantra: "Going forward is a way to retreat. " TTOP

refulgentis 15 hours ago

Flagged: code and prose written by an LLM, and uncanny-valley as a result - a few examples:

- the programming language part is dropped almost immediately by the LLM.

- The unrelated meat emojis to give it an animated background

- Painfully generic / not attempting to make a joke: "This language finally lets me express my true feelings about variable assignment."

- Every section has exactly the "right" length, ~3-5 items per list, ~2-3 paragraphs per section.

Hate to eat downvotes for saying this, I hate what FB / Zuck too and understand the impulse to treat it as unneeded negativity.

However, I've been on HN for 16 years, and can't remember a time I've seen a human-generated surface-level satire persist in the top posts. Seems to me the length and subject let the slop skate, at least so far.

  • StilesCrisis 14 hours ago

    Smoked meat is not at all random here. Google "Zuckerberg sweet baby rays". This is the deep Facebook lore.

    • jayzalowitz 13 hours ago

      Hi author here: 100% smoked meats floating around was out of my head and not the ai.

  • xerox13ster 14 hours ago

    Have you never seen the Zuckerberg “in my backyard smoking meats with the boys” video? It’s so uncomfortable.

    The meat emojis are relevant

jkhall81 17 hours ago

why?

  • jayzalowitz 13 hours ago

    Author here:

    Yeah actually, I wanted to demonstrate claude code, and my relatively complicated process for developement to someone, so I made a programming language to show them.

    I actually met mark when we were both mentoring the fwd.us hackathon, from that limited interaction, I do think hed probably get a reasonable chuckle out of this.

  • footy 17 hours ago

    to move fast and break things, it's right there!